free! dumb!

By Todd Stadler · Wednesday, October 16, 2002 5:18pm

I'm back from Italy, and completely inable to summarize how nice it all was, so instead I jotted down the following screed.

As a famous philosopher once said, "I like to be in America ... everything free in America."

Indeed. On the way to my free train ride to work this morning, I passed a free water fountain and stopped to read a free newspaper.

Now we just need to work on installing free tissue dispensers so I can get over this free cold I picked up in Italy.

Fine, Italy actually has lots of free newspapers. And there is no shortage of free drinkable water, in Rome, at least ? the city's many fountains are all acqua potabile. Of course, drinking water with your meal will still cost you a pretty euro (and I mean that ? they really are pretty).

But there are no free train rides to be found in Italy, except for the unscrupulous. And honestly, people, what's the point of having a socialist movement if you can't have free train rides? I ask you.

Hmm. Now that I think about it, not everything is free in America, as having my vacation photos developed has now proven quite dramatically.

So allow me to amend my original statement to say, "I like to be in America, Mexican food in America."

Good enough. I'm glad to be back.